Factional struggle

The violent struggle in the Middle East has taken a turn for the worse as followers of the Humus faction clash with the supporters of the Fatter Party; fundamentalist dietary Muslims, who knew it would come to this? Meanwhile the flames have been fanned still further from Europe as a Danish pastry in the shape of the Prophet Mo'Betta Blues went on sale causing outrage among the fundamentalist confectionery and bakery wing of Islam. Has the world gone mad? Still, most haven't tumbled to the fact that the humble croissant is actually shaped so Westerners can celebrate defeating the Ottoman Muslim hordes by eating the symbol of their land. Phew, thank goodness they haven't cottoned to that one yet. Welcome to the next phase of the War on Terror - now even food isn't safe...