The Graffiti Project
What do a bunch of famous Brazilian street artists have in common with a historic Scottish castle? Well, they are painting graffiti all over it - at the invitation of the laird. Turns out Kelburn Castle, 35 miles west of Glasgow, was covered with a dodgy rendering a few decades back which is proving detrimental to the ancient stonework underneath it, so it will be coming off in the future. Meantime it provides an amazing temporary canvas for the Sao Paulo Crew to work their colourful designs on. Not often you see a historic castle being redecorated like this - its been on the Scottish news a lot in the last week or two and really made me smile. The month long project has an official site here with lots of pictures and some very cool time lapse videos of them working (when the Scottish weather doesn't interrupt them).
Friday, May 25, 2007
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Springside
The massive former Scottish and Newcastle Brewery site a few minutes up the road from me, right next to the cinema Mel and I regularly go to, is being demolished at last - it has been empty for some time (brewing was once big business in Edinburgh, probably why it is such a real ale city, but now it is mostly gone - thankfully the much better Caledonian Brewery is still going strong. This area was popular for brewing because of the pure water from local wells, the so-called 'charmed circle' of wells). There have been plans to redevelop it for years and finally they seem to be making progress - the site is so big it goes across both sides of the main road; now one half is totally gone - where the buildings and cooling towers and tall walls were there is just fields of rubble. Quite odd to walk past this spot which was so built up before and now I can see clear across it to the area beyond. Not the first time it has been redeveloped in the last century though, as the old tenement where Sir Sean Connery was born was next to it, but was demolished long ago. In fact, he used to deliver milk around there as a young lad - these days when he comes back to the area it is to walk the red carpet at Film Festival launches; talk about change.
In such a built up area near the city centre there obviously isn't a lot of opportunity to remake areas, so I'm keen to see them do something nice with such an enormous brownfield site. We're promised a mix of business spots, leisure and new homes with much-needed open spaces - this part of town lacks some decent open areas because it is so heavily built up. It all ties in with the revamp of the nearby canal, which now has lots of barges on it (some for holidays, some folks living on them year round), new flats overlooking it and waterside restaurants and cafes and a redone towpath for walking and cycling on which Mel and I make use of a lot (beats walking by the busy main road and you can feed the ducks as well as grab some nice photos). Of course, it may end up being a mess as these things can be sometimes, but hopefully they make a good job of it since it is going to be a big part of my local environment (and probably boost the already inflated housing prices) - they've put up a website for this new area, which they are going to call Springside and a short video, which also takes in some of the history of the Fountainbridge area.
I wonder if it will actually look like this when done. Always interesting to see something in transition; few years back a major brewery, then empty buildings, now rubble and in a couple of years people will have their homes there - in fact, a lot of people; this isn't just a couple of old buildings, its a big site and will change the nature of the area a lot. Right now it is just an idea of a place; I think I will enjoy it being translated into a real place - if any part of a city can be said to be truly real, since some of it is always in our impressions of it and our imagination and our memories.
The massive former Scottish and Newcastle Brewery site a few minutes up the road from me, right next to the cinema Mel and I regularly go to, is being demolished at last - it has been empty for some time (brewing was once big business in Edinburgh, probably why it is such a real ale city, but now it is mostly gone - thankfully the much better Caledonian Brewery is still going strong. This area was popular for brewing because of the pure water from local wells, the so-called 'charmed circle' of wells). There have been plans to redevelop it for years and finally they seem to be making progress - the site is so big it goes across both sides of the main road; now one half is totally gone - where the buildings and cooling towers and tall walls were there is just fields of rubble. Quite odd to walk past this spot which was so built up before and now I can see clear across it to the area beyond. Not the first time it has been redeveloped in the last century though, as the old tenement where Sir Sean Connery was born was next to it, but was demolished long ago. In fact, he used to deliver milk around there as a young lad - these days when he comes back to the area it is to walk the red carpet at Film Festival launches; talk about change.
In such a built up area near the city centre there obviously isn't a lot of opportunity to remake areas, so I'm keen to see them do something nice with such an enormous brownfield site. We're promised a mix of business spots, leisure and new homes with much-needed open spaces - this part of town lacks some decent open areas because it is so heavily built up. It all ties in with the revamp of the nearby canal, which now has lots of barges on it (some for holidays, some folks living on them year round), new flats overlooking it and waterside restaurants and cafes and a redone towpath for walking and cycling on which Mel and I make use of a lot (beats walking by the busy main road and you can feed the ducks as well as grab some nice photos). Of course, it may end up being a mess as these things can be sometimes, but hopefully they make a good job of it since it is going to be a big part of my local environment (and probably boost the already inflated housing prices) - they've put up a website for this new area, which they are going to call Springside and a short video, which also takes in some of the history of the Fountainbridge area.
I wonder if it will actually look like this when done. Always interesting to see something in transition; few years back a major brewery, then empty buildings, now rubble and in a couple of years people will have their homes there - in fact, a lot of people; this isn't just a couple of old buildings, its a big site and will change the nature of the area a lot. Right now it is just an idea of a place; I think I will enjoy it being translated into a real place - if any part of a city can be said to be truly real, since some of it is always in our impressions of it and our imagination and our memories.
That lack of information
I dropped an email to Lothian Buses suggesting they should have some decent signs up on the stops near me which are out of use due to roadworks and got a reply saying they put them up last week. I use them everyday and I never saw any and since a number of folks have been waiting at the stops this week oblivious I'm not the only one. If they are there then they are pretty poorly placed since no-one seems to have spotted them - even this morning I had to tell someone standing at my regular spot that they had to go along several stops to another street to get the diverted service. Still, on the positive side, as I headed to a different street to get one of those diverted buses this morning I saw one I usually get just picking away as I approached. Because of the diversions it is hard to work out when they will come, so it is annoying to miss one and have no idea how long it might be till the next. And then the very friendly driver saw the heavy traffic ahead, recognised me, opened the door and beckoned me in. So praise this time round for a very friendly service and isn't it nice the way when someone unexpectedly does something like that for you it puts you into a much better mood for the whole day?
I dropped an email to Lothian Buses suggesting they should have some decent signs up on the stops near me which are out of use due to roadworks and got a reply saying they put them up last week. I use them everyday and I never saw any and since a number of folks have been waiting at the stops this week oblivious I'm not the only one. If they are there then they are pretty poorly placed since no-one seems to have spotted them - even this morning I had to tell someone standing at my regular spot that they had to go along several stops to another street to get the diverted service. Still, on the positive side, as I headed to a different street to get one of those diverted buses this morning I saw one I usually get just picking away as I approached. Because of the diversions it is hard to work out when they will come, so it is annoying to miss one and have no idea how long it might be till the next. And then the very friendly driver saw the heavy traffic ahead, recognised me, opened the door and beckoned me in. So praise this time round for a very friendly service and isn't it nice the way when someone unexpectedly does something like that for you it puts you into a much better mood for the whole day?
Monday, May 21, 2007
Lack of information
Road work signs have sprung up on the main road near me in the last week announcing that a chunk of this very busy road would be closed from Monday for quite some time for major repairs. Since this is one of the main routes for this side of the city I assumed this could have a major effect on the bus service. The sort of major effect that would mean the local bus company would put up some information on the affected stop to say, sorry, you can't get a bus from here, you must head over several streets to this point to meet the diverted services. You'd think that. But not, Lothian Regional Transport never bothered their arse and even this morning there were folk standing at stops where no bus was going to come, not a single sign to be seen to tell them there was no service. If you went to their website then dug around in the news section you can find out this information; fine for me, but I am guessing not every single passenger who uses this busy route was able to do this, or even knew to do it - and they shouldn't have to since it should be posted on the bus stops taken out of service during the work. Piss poor customer care.
Road work signs have sprung up on the main road near me in the last week announcing that a chunk of this very busy road would be closed from Monday for quite some time for major repairs. Since this is one of the main routes for this side of the city I assumed this could have a major effect on the bus service. The sort of major effect that would mean the local bus company would put up some information on the affected stop to say, sorry, you can't get a bus from here, you must head over several streets to this point to meet the diverted services. You'd think that. But not, Lothian Regional Transport never bothered their arse and even this morning there were folk standing at stops where no bus was going to come, not a single sign to be seen to tell them there was no service. If you went to their website then dug around in the news section you can find out this information; fine for me, but I am guessing not every single passenger who uses this busy route was able to do this, or even knew to do it - and they shouldn't have to since it should be posted on the bus stops taken out of service during the work. Piss poor customer care.
More Bristol
Some more pics I snapped going back and forth from my hotel to the Comics Expo in Bristol.
Old brewery building converted into some rather attractive looking apartments
Nice church tower down a street near the pub where I had a couple of well-earned and gorgeous-tasting pints of the local Butcombe Brewery Gold (so disappointed I can't get it up here, but the brewery only sell it within a 50 mile radius).
I passed this beautiful, big church on the way in from the airport; the bells were peeling quite wonderfully as I passed.
This drunkenly leaning tower is quite striking; a friend at the convention told me it was an old church gutted by bombing by the Luftwaffe during the Second World War.
I loved the plaster relief of an elephant on this building near the market.
The Redcliffe Wharf down by the river; as with a lot of riverside cities there is a mix of older, decrepit buildings and freshly restored old buildings like this given a new lease of life as the once busy, commercial area is reborn from a workspace into a living and leisure space with new apartments and pleasure craft, restaurants and bars.
Another nicely restored old building
Its not all old buildings decaying or being restored, there was this unusual modern tower stuck in the middle of a building site.
No, it isn't the emblem of the male stripper's society, its the T&GWU, Transport and General Worker's Union.
Some more pics I snapped going back and forth from my hotel to the Comics Expo in Bristol.
Old brewery building converted into some rather attractive looking apartments
Nice church tower down a street near the pub where I had a couple of well-earned and gorgeous-tasting pints of the local Butcombe Brewery Gold (so disappointed I can't get it up here, but the brewery only sell it within a 50 mile radius).
I passed this beautiful, big church on the way in from the airport; the bells were peeling quite wonderfully as I passed.
This drunkenly leaning tower is quite striking; a friend at the convention told me it was an old church gutted by bombing by the Luftwaffe during the Second World War.
I loved the plaster relief of an elephant on this building near the market.
The Redcliffe Wharf down by the river; as with a lot of riverside cities there is a mix of older, decrepit buildings and freshly restored old buildings like this given a new lease of life as the once busy, commercial area is reborn from a workspace into a living and leisure space with new apartments and pleasure craft, restaurants and bars.
Another nicely restored old building
Its not all old buildings decaying or being restored, there was this unusual modern tower stuck in the middle of a building site.
No, it isn't the emblem of the male stripper's society, its the T&GWU, Transport and General Worker's Union.
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Big, shiny bauble
I got lost trying to get from the comics expo to my hotel; well, I say lost, actually I navigated my way perfectly well to where it was supposed to be according to Google Maps, except it wasn't there. Neither was the lane it was supposed to be on. Check my little printed out map - so organised, navigating my way in a city I've never been to before quite well, shame the hotel wasn't there! Check street names, yup I have come to the right spot on the map. But no hotel and no lane for the hotel... After several circuits of the block it should be on I spot a branch of Stamfords, the travel book specialists and try in there - a look in their A-Z maps shows the street isn't even on the print maps. Sinking feeling. The helpful bookseller recognises the name of the hotel though and points me over the river to an area being redeveloped (hence why not on the map yet, I suppose), so an extra few minutes later and finally I find my hotel and can check in. It turned out to be right behind this retro-futuristic silver sphere by the riverside.
Now I knew where the darned place was in relation to the convention I walked a different route back this time (luckily I have a knack for working out my way round places, so I thought I'd get at least a tiny bit more of the city as I went back and forth). Just past here on the riverside there were lots of bars and restaurants; after a showery day the evening became clear, warm and sunny, quite perfect for a walk back (and it was nice to see Edinburgh doesn't have the monopoly on badly dressed hen parties on Saturdays!).
After not having much time for a proper meal during the day it was time for some decent nosh and oh my, what's this, a gorgeous cool ale from the local Butcombe Brewery (Butcombe Gold, I think I just found my perfect summer ale, must see if the local Wetherspoon here has it).
Just what I need, a reflecting surface which makes me look shorter and fatter...
I liked these colourful old tenements overlooking the river - the Bristol version of Balamory :-)?
Just across the river from the hotel was Brunel's great S.S. Great Britain, although sadly seeing the masts of this revolutionary huge steamship was as close as I got to her.
I got lost trying to get from the comics expo to my hotel; well, I say lost, actually I navigated my way perfectly well to where it was supposed to be according to Google Maps, except it wasn't there. Neither was the lane it was supposed to be on. Check my little printed out map - so organised, navigating my way in a city I've never been to before quite well, shame the hotel wasn't there! Check street names, yup I have come to the right spot on the map. But no hotel and no lane for the hotel... After several circuits of the block it should be on I spot a branch of Stamfords, the travel book specialists and try in there - a look in their A-Z maps shows the street isn't even on the print maps. Sinking feeling. The helpful bookseller recognises the name of the hotel though and points me over the river to an area being redeveloped (hence why not on the map yet, I suppose), so an extra few minutes later and finally I find my hotel and can check in. It turned out to be right behind this retro-futuristic silver sphere by the riverside.
Now I knew where the darned place was in relation to the convention I walked a different route back this time (luckily I have a knack for working out my way round places, so I thought I'd get at least a tiny bit more of the city as I went back and forth). Just past here on the riverside there were lots of bars and restaurants; after a showery day the evening became clear, warm and sunny, quite perfect for a walk back (and it was nice to see Edinburgh doesn't have the monopoly on badly dressed hen parties on Saturdays!).
After not having much time for a proper meal during the day it was time for some decent nosh and oh my, what's this, a gorgeous cool ale from the local Butcombe Brewery (Butcombe Gold, I think I just found my perfect summer ale, must see if the local Wetherspoon here has it).
Just what I need, a reflecting surface which makes me look shorter and fatter...
I liked these colourful old tenements overlooking the river - the Bristol version of Balamory :-)?
Just across the river from the hotel was Brunel's great S.S. Great Britain, although sadly seeing the masts of this revolutionary huge steamship was as close as I got to her.
Animated Calvin and Hobbes
I came across this today, a short, unofficial animated Calvin and Hobbes cartoon. We're unlikely to see a full length Calvin and Hobbes cartoon in the near future and of course Bill Watterson finished the comics a while back, but this short little gem by Italian film student Donato Di Carlo (in Italian with English subtitles) captures the spirit of Calvin and Hobbes very well and really made me smile.
I came across this today, a short, unofficial animated Calvin and Hobbes cartoon. We're unlikely to see a full length Calvin and Hobbes cartoon in the near future and of course Bill Watterson finished the comics a while back, but this short little gem by Italian film student Donato Di Carlo (in Italian with English subtitles) captures the spirit of Calvin and Hobbes very well and really made me smile.
Monday, May 14, 2007
Flying
Very early on Saturday I headed out, still half asleep, to Edinburgh Airport to catch a flight down to Bristol for the Comics Expo (which I've written up on the FPI blog and posted more pics of on a Flickr set here). I still can't quite work out why flying by jet is cheaper than travelling by train, but it is and obviously a lot faster. Well, the flying part is, but first of all comes the part where you trudge out to the airport, shuffle past piles of people at this time of year who are obviously on their way to their holiday destinations, some optimists among them clad only in shorts and espadrilles despite the fact it is a cold, wet, grey early morning here and they aren't in Ibiza yet. Get there by the required time for check in so you can then spend over an hour sitting around in the departure lounge - flying is fast, but the waiting at the airport bit is tedious, a hurry up and wait system in action. And as I am sitting there at an ungodly early hour I hear my name and find myself next to someone I haven't seen in years who used to share a flat with one of my best friends when we were students. Small world.
Eventually called for our flight I troop down the ramp only to join another waiting line which eventually moves and out we go to get crammed into an Airbus, where I'm lucky enough to have a window seat. I haven't flown in a number of years - I've been lucky enough to have trips in cool little light aircraft, turboprops, jetliners and even a helicopter before, but I've not even been on a cheap package flight in years. Most of the tedium of the check-in, security rules (there is a huge perspex box of abandoned Swiss Army knives by the security entrance) and the gouging prices of airport food spots fades away as the aircraft taxis to the end of the runway and those huge jet engines power up with a roar like a screaming dragon and I had that same fantastic feeling I always got from roller coaster rides (I rode my first proper roller coaster when I was about 5 or 6 with my dad, loved them ever since), the same feeling of anticipation, the moment before acceleration to take off is like the moment when the roller coaster gets to the top of the first hill and you know in seconds the gentle movement will explode into furious speed. Full power throttling down the tarmac, nose inclining, straining skywards then as the rear wheels join the front in the air you get that brilliant lurch in the stomach as your body realises there is no longer any solid ground beneath you.
I was originally hoping it would be a clear, sunny day like the ones we've enjoyed recently, but it was a dull, grey day, full of clouds, the sort of day Spike Milligan once described as "the sky being full of grey sponges" and I thought, damn, there goes a rare chance for me to see Edinburgh from the air. Within seconds the entire world vanished as the plane entered the low-lying clouds hanging over the capital; it was like being in the Daffy Duck cartoon when he runs off the end of the film frame into an off-white realm where nothing exists, the world now only the plane, the edge of reality defined by the end of the wing tips, beyond which there is only uniform blankness and I sigh, mentally missing the view I could have been having. And then a few moments later the plane pierces the top of the clouds and its like entering a new world.
The world below in grey rain, the world of 30, 000 feet is above the clouds, which lie below me, a brilliant white as far as the eye can see, like looking down on vast fields of snowy Antarctic plains; above an incredibly clear sky and a blue above me which is a shade you simply never see from the ground, all lit by brilliant sunlight. It's a miracle of engineering and human ingenuity and we take it for granted because so many of us so it now. How quickly we forget that it is only in the last century or so that we've been allowed to do something humans have dreamed of for thousands of years - we can fly. We can skip through a clear blue sky and look down upon the clouds from our loftier height. So many of us do it so often we forget how special it actually is, but just think on those generations of people who dreamed what it would be like in times gone past and here we are, we can do it and we spend more time talking about the pain in the bum of check-in...
(I have no idea where this is, but it was one of the few glimpses of the ground I got through the clouds, not long after leaving Bristol while we were still climbing, somewhere on the far south west of England)
Very early on Saturday I headed out, still half asleep, to Edinburgh Airport to catch a flight down to Bristol for the Comics Expo (which I've written up on the FPI blog and posted more pics of on a Flickr set here). I still can't quite work out why flying by jet is cheaper than travelling by train, but it is and obviously a lot faster. Well, the flying part is, but first of all comes the part where you trudge out to the airport, shuffle past piles of people at this time of year who are obviously on their way to their holiday destinations, some optimists among them clad only in shorts and espadrilles despite the fact it is a cold, wet, grey early morning here and they aren't in Ibiza yet. Get there by the required time for check in so you can then spend over an hour sitting around in the departure lounge - flying is fast, but the waiting at the airport bit is tedious, a hurry up and wait system in action. And as I am sitting there at an ungodly early hour I hear my name and find myself next to someone I haven't seen in years who used to share a flat with one of my best friends when we were students. Small world.
Eventually called for our flight I troop down the ramp only to join another waiting line which eventually moves and out we go to get crammed into an Airbus, where I'm lucky enough to have a window seat. I haven't flown in a number of years - I've been lucky enough to have trips in cool little light aircraft, turboprops, jetliners and even a helicopter before, but I've not even been on a cheap package flight in years. Most of the tedium of the check-in, security rules (there is a huge perspex box of abandoned Swiss Army knives by the security entrance) and the gouging prices of airport food spots fades away as the aircraft taxis to the end of the runway and those huge jet engines power up with a roar like a screaming dragon and I had that same fantastic feeling I always got from roller coaster rides (I rode my first proper roller coaster when I was about 5 or 6 with my dad, loved them ever since), the same feeling of anticipation, the moment before acceleration to take off is like the moment when the roller coaster gets to the top of the first hill and you know in seconds the gentle movement will explode into furious speed. Full power throttling down the tarmac, nose inclining, straining skywards then as the rear wheels join the front in the air you get that brilliant lurch in the stomach as your body realises there is no longer any solid ground beneath you.
I was originally hoping it would be a clear, sunny day like the ones we've enjoyed recently, but it was a dull, grey day, full of clouds, the sort of day Spike Milligan once described as "the sky being full of grey sponges" and I thought, damn, there goes a rare chance for me to see Edinburgh from the air. Within seconds the entire world vanished as the plane entered the low-lying clouds hanging over the capital; it was like being in the Daffy Duck cartoon when he runs off the end of the film frame into an off-white realm where nothing exists, the world now only the plane, the edge of reality defined by the end of the wing tips, beyond which there is only uniform blankness and I sigh, mentally missing the view I could have been having. And then a few moments later the plane pierces the top of the clouds and its like entering a new world.
The world below in grey rain, the world of 30, 000 feet is above the clouds, which lie below me, a brilliant white as far as the eye can see, like looking down on vast fields of snowy Antarctic plains; above an incredibly clear sky and a blue above me which is a shade you simply never see from the ground, all lit by brilliant sunlight. It's a miracle of engineering and human ingenuity and we take it for granted because so many of us so it now. How quickly we forget that it is only in the last century or so that we've been allowed to do something humans have dreamed of for thousands of years - we can fly. We can skip through a clear blue sky and look down upon the clouds from our loftier height. So many of us do it so often we forget how special it actually is, but just think on those generations of people who dreamed what it would be like in times gone past and here we are, we can do it and we spend more time talking about the pain in the bum of check-in...
(I have no idea where this is, but it was one of the few glimpses of the ground I got through the clouds, not long after leaving Bristol while we were still climbing, somewhere on the far south west of England)
Thursday, May 10, 2007
Stylish
Kate Moss launches a range of clothes and label zombies queue up to buy them, regardless of the fact that she has bugger all to do with designing or creating them, her name is purely a badge to stick on the clothes to lure the gullible in. They all know this, but it's Kate Moss, so they all rush out to buy them so they too can resemble an intolerably skinny crack whore - yeah, that's a cool, individual look... Then Lily Allen launches a clothes range. Lily Allen?!?!? I like Lily's music, but is has she been around long enough to be famous enough to be behind a fashion range?!?! And again, who gives a smeg about buying something just because some money grubbing celeb sold out for some extra moolah? The cult of celeb is eroding 21st century civilisation and seems to devour many people's ability to function as individuals, turning them into mind-numbed sheep following directions.
Still, nothing new there, really - a glance at history shows many truly stupid people will follow any trend from the famous rather than make decisions themselves, even down to medical procedures (anesthetic wasn't trusted until Queen Victoria used it, then suddenly it was okay; cremation was mistrusted by god-fearing Victorians until nobility had used it). Why do so many folks so blindly follow trends set by the famous? Copy David Beckham's hair, wear clothes because some drug-fueled model sticks her name on them (shouldn't Moss be selling hankerchiefs for wiping coke off noses???) and in the process look like a million other idiots while shoving more of your small monies into the groaningly huge bank accounts of celebs. I do despair of people sometimes.
Kate Moss launches a range of clothes and label zombies queue up to buy them, regardless of the fact that she has bugger all to do with designing or creating them, her name is purely a badge to stick on the clothes to lure the gullible in. They all know this, but it's Kate Moss, so they all rush out to buy them so they too can resemble an intolerably skinny crack whore - yeah, that's a cool, individual look... Then Lily Allen launches a clothes range. Lily Allen?!?!? I like Lily's music, but is has she been around long enough to be famous enough to be behind a fashion range?!?! And again, who gives a smeg about buying something just because some money grubbing celeb sold out for some extra moolah? The cult of celeb is eroding 21st century civilisation and seems to devour many people's ability to function as individuals, turning them into mind-numbed sheep following directions.
Still, nothing new there, really - a glance at history shows many truly stupid people will follow any trend from the famous rather than make decisions themselves, even down to medical procedures (anesthetic wasn't trusted until Queen Victoria used it, then suddenly it was okay; cremation was mistrusted by god-fearing Victorians until nobility had used it). Why do so many folks so blindly follow trends set by the famous? Copy David Beckham's hair, wear clothes because some drug-fueled model sticks her name on them (shouldn't Moss be selling hankerchiefs for wiping coke off noses???) and in the process look like a million other idiots while shoving more of your small monies into the groaningly huge bank accounts of celebs. I do despair of people sometimes.
Wednesday, May 9, 2007
Squeezable
In the supermarket on the way home tonight I notice now you can get Branston Pickle in a new squeezable bottle. I've seen ketchup, mayo and syrups in squeezable bottles, but pickle? Is it just me or is almost every foodstuff slowly moving to squeezy bottles so we lazy 21st century sods don't need to undo a lid or employ our opposable digits by using a knife? What's next for the squeezable bottle? The cat's food? Pizza in a bottle? What about biscuits? Tired of biccy crumbs when you have milk and cookies in bed? Then try our new Squeezable Cookies! Why is only my cream cheese in a squeezy bottle? Why not the oatcakes too? Hell, put them in the same bottle, squeeze out some Laughing Cow and Nairn's oatcakes right into your gob. Jeez, how lazy we're getting... and more harder to recycle plastic bottles instead of glass, but hey, if it saves a minute who cares...
Further round and into the aisle for drinks, pick up some fruit juices for breakfast - hmmm, cartons, not squeezy bottles, how primitive, I have to open cartons and pour?!?!? What am I, a caveman??!?! Let's see, we have Cranberry, Cranberry Light, Cranberry and Orange, Cranberry and Lime, Cranberry and Apple, Cranberry and Mango, Cranberry and Prozac, Cranberry and Cranberry... You know, I like cranberry (especially diluted with vodka) but there seems to be a sinister conspiracy going on in our supermarkets, a twin-pronged, subtle plan to make us all reliant on squeezy bottles and cranberry mixtures. How long till our technology is similarly affected? Will my next laptop be cranberry flavoured and come out of a squeezy bottle?
In the supermarket on the way home tonight I notice now you can get Branston Pickle in a new squeezable bottle. I've seen ketchup, mayo and syrups in squeezable bottles, but pickle? Is it just me or is almost every foodstuff slowly moving to squeezy bottles so we lazy 21st century sods don't need to undo a lid or employ our opposable digits by using a knife? What's next for the squeezable bottle? The cat's food? Pizza in a bottle? What about biscuits? Tired of biccy crumbs when you have milk and cookies in bed? Then try our new Squeezable Cookies! Why is only my cream cheese in a squeezy bottle? Why not the oatcakes too? Hell, put them in the same bottle, squeeze out some Laughing Cow and Nairn's oatcakes right into your gob. Jeez, how lazy we're getting... and more harder to recycle plastic bottles instead of glass, but hey, if it saves a minute who cares...
Further round and into the aisle for drinks, pick up some fruit juices for breakfast - hmmm, cartons, not squeezy bottles, how primitive, I have to open cartons and pour?!?!? What am I, a caveman??!?! Let's see, we have Cranberry, Cranberry Light, Cranberry and Orange, Cranberry and Lime, Cranberry and Apple, Cranberry and Mango, Cranberry and Prozac, Cranberry and Cranberry... You know, I like cranberry (especially diluted with vodka) but there seems to be a sinister conspiracy going on in our supermarkets, a twin-pronged, subtle plan to make us all reliant on squeezy bottles and cranberry mixtures. How long till our technology is similarly affected? Will my next laptop be cranberry flavoured and come out of a squeezy bottle?
Flâneur animation
A very neat little Flâneur animation by Gould (amazing how inventive someone can be in a minute and a half) - Link via Boing Boing.
A very neat little Flâneur animation by Gould (amazing how inventive someone can be in a minute and a half) - Link via Boing Boing.
Monday, May 7, 2007
Mmm, tastes like chicken...
Boing Boing has a link to a story from a PBS documentary of a tarantula which is almost a foot across, which apparently devours chickens. Yikes! Man, I'm not overly arachnaphobiac - I'm not keen on spiders, but I'm not utterly terrified of them either - but this would give you the heebie jeebies! I wonder if this crittur is related to the giant spider of Metebelis III who brought Jon Pertwee's era in Doctor Who to an end? I think this is one spider my cats probably wouldn't want to chase and eat...
Boing Boing has a link to a story from a PBS documentary of a tarantula which is almost a foot across, which apparently devours chickens. Yikes! Man, I'm not overly arachnaphobiac - I'm not keen on spiders, but I'm not utterly terrified of them either - but this would give you the heebie jeebies! I wonder if this crittur is related to the giant spider of Metebelis III who brought Jon Pertwee's era in Doctor Who to an end? I think this is one spider my cats probably wouldn't want to chase and eat...
Sunday, May 6, 2007
Web-slinging
After all the hype and PR frenzy around the world Sam Raimi's Spider-Man 3 finally hit the cinemas this weekend, and off we went to a packed theatre to catch it. Two major villains this time (three if you count some bits with Harry Osborn's son of the Green Goblin), more personal and romantic trouble for Peter Parker (including a rather awful Emo look which makes him appear like a reject from My Chemical Romance) and the introduction of Gwen and Captain Stacey - if you aren't familiar with the comics that might not mean much to you, but they are (especially Gwen), very important characters from the comics. Shame then, that they were barely used, making me wonder why all the hype to excited fanboys about her appearance...
The film itself was very disappointing - far too 'busy' as my mate remarked, like they were thinking, must outdo the first two movies, pack more in regardless of the effect on the story. Don't get me wrong, it isn't a bad film; if it were the first Spidey movie you had seen you'd probably enjoy it more, but it lacks some solid direction, has too much squeezed into it for no reason other than trying to make it look 'wow' (which rarely works if it makes the story suffer) while the emotional arc was just a tiny bit tedious this time, unlike the previous movies. It is still worth seeing though - there are some great scenes there, the Sandman is well done, Venom looks just like he should from the comics (but as with Gwen, not used properly) and I liked the humanised version of Flint Marko, a petty hoodlum, but one driven to crime because he is desperate to find money for treatment for his ill daughter.
And the usual brace of cameos from Ted Raimi, Bruce Campbell (as a brilliant French maitre'd from the Clueso school) and, of course, Stan the Man Lee. Enjoyable Saturday night movie, not brilliant but not bad, suffering mostly by comparison with the first two since we know they can do better than this. Here's hoping Pirates of the Caribbean 3 is better (what is it with 'part 3's in movies this year?) - the second one was rather by the numbers and lacking heart, made me think of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom compared to Raiders of the Lost Ark; bigger budget, the right set pieces and cast (apart from the female lead) but it lacked heart and felt like blockbuster by the numbers. Here's hoping Pirates 3 is more Last Crusade then, so I can enjoy some damned fine swashbuckling.
After all the hype and PR frenzy around the world Sam Raimi's Spider-Man 3 finally hit the cinemas this weekend, and off we went to a packed theatre to catch it. Two major villains this time (three if you count some bits with Harry Osborn's son of the Green Goblin), more personal and romantic trouble for Peter Parker (including a rather awful Emo look which makes him appear like a reject from My Chemical Romance) and the introduction of Gwen and Captain Stacey - if you aren't familiar with the comics that might not mean much to you, but they are (especially Gwen), very important characters from the comics. Shame then, that they were barely used, making me wonder why all the hype to excited fanboys about her appearance...
The film itself was very disappointing - far too 'busy' as my mate remarked, like they were thinking, must outdo the first two movies, pack more in regardless of the effect on the story. Don't get me wrong, it isn't a bad film; if it were the first Spidey movie you had seen you'd probably enjoy it more, but it lacks some solid direction, has too much squeezed into it for no reason other than trying to make it look 'wow' (which rarely works if it makes the story suffer) while the emotional arc was just a tiny bit tedious this time, unlike the previous movies. It is still worth seeing though - there are some great scenes there, the Sandman is well done, Venom looks just like he should from the comics (but as with Gwen, not used properly) and I liked the humanised version of Flint Marko, a petty hoodlum, but one driven to crime because he is desperate to find money for treatment for his ill daughter.
And the usual brace of cameos from Ted Raimi, Bruce Campbell (as a brilliant French maitre'd from the Clueso school) and, of course, Stan the Man Lee. Enjoyable Saturday night movie, not brilliant but not bad, suffering mostly by comparison with the first two since we know they can do better than this. Here's hoping Pirates of the Caribbean 3 is better (what is it with 'part 3's in movies this year?) - the second one was rather by the numbers and lacking heart, made me think of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom compared to Raiders of the Lost Ark; bigger budget, the right set pieces and cast (apart from the female lead) but it lacked heart and felt like blockbuster by the numbers. Here's hoping Pirates 3 is more Last Crusade then, so I can enjoy some damned fine swashbuckling.
Saturday, May 5, 2007
Elected
Well, finally last night the last result crawled in from Thursday's elections (for local councils and also the Scottish Parliament) - there was a huge mess in counting votes because of a new syste, exacerbated by running both parliamentary and local elections at the same time, meaning three sets for folks to fill in (the parliament has two votes, one for constituency MSPs and another for the list vote, which gives independents a chance) and using two different methods. I found it clear enough to use, but I actually took a few minutes to read the instructions, I suspect a lot of the spoiled papers are a result of people simply not paying attention or because they are so used to the older system they never realised it was now different.
Still, with tens of thousands of spoiled papers and a counting breakdown which delayed everything it is little wonder Scottish political commentators are calling it a 'guddle' (there's a good old Scots term for you). And it means a large number of people have been disenfranchised; since in some places the winner only got in by the skin of their teeth (sometimes as low as 40-odd votes) but the number of spoiled ballot papers was higher than their majority it effectively means there can't be much confidence in their election. Between electoral mess-ups, disenfranchised voters and the recent bout of sunny weather it is just like being in Florida...
So after being neck and neck all day yesterday the final result has come down to the Scottish National Party under Alex Salmond winning by a single seat, to be the biggest party in the Scots parliament. But with such a tiny majority they can't form a proper government without going into coalition, most likely with the Liberal Democrats. The Libs bland leader in Scotland already ruled out doing a deal with the SNP if they stick to their guns to set up a referendum for the people to vote on whether we should pursue independence or not, which I really don't understand. I can understand the Libs may be against independence (I am far from convinced myself since no-one has really, properly explained how we can work it) but to be against the most democratic of things, a public referendum where all the people are asked what they think is simply foolish and undemocratic and, in my opinion, a betrayal of Liberal values, which is another reason why I have no faith in the Scottish Liberals anymore. Agree or disagree with the idea of independence by all means, but how can you be against allowing the people to vote on it??
It is also a big shocker to Labour - Scotland has been a huge block of Labour votes for generations, something they could take for granted, even in the bad old days of Herr Thatchler's evil dictatorship from London in the 80s when Labour lost tons of support they still had a huge block here. Now they have blown that after decades, which speaks volumes for how much people are pissed off with their cronyism, nepotism, corruption and utter inept handling of government. A lot of it was also because of what the Labour party has done in power in the London parliament under Blair - clearly a lot of us thought yeah, we know that isn't the fault of the Scottish parliament, but neither have you stood up and criticised them, so you are tarred with the same brush.
Still, such a small majority means it looks like people didn't vote so much for a march to independence as vote against Labour in disgust. It does means that when the notorious war criminal Blair steps down from the London parliament and Gordon Brown takes over (as seems likely) he is going to be a Labour prime minister in London dealing with a Scottish parliament run by his political opponents (embarassingly the constituency right next to Brown's own in Fife also went to the SNP) which means the relationship between London and Edinburgh is going to be rather interesting in coming months and years - which I am sure Salmond will exploit to push the independence agenda. I wonder if I should declare my own Independent Republic of Woolamaloo and offer to make it the free homeland for bloggerdom?
Well, finally last night the last result crawled in from Thursday's elections (for local councils and also the Scottish Parliament) - there was a huge mess in counting votes because of a new syste, exacerbated by running both parliamentary and local elections at the same time, meaning three sets for folks to fill in (the parliament has two votes, one for constituency MSPs and another for the list vote, which gives independents a chance) and using two different methods. I found it clear enough to use, but I actually took a few minutes to read the instructions, I suspect a lot of the spoiled papers are a result of people simply not paying attention or because they are so used to the older system they never realised it was now different.
Still, with tens of thousands of spoiled papers and a counting breakdown which delayed everything it is little wonder Scottish political commentators are calling it a 'guddle' (there's a good old Scots term for you). And it means a large number of people have been disenfranchised; since in some places the winner only got in by the skin of their teeth (sometimes as low as 40-odd votes) but the number of spoiled ballot papers was higher than their majority it effectively means there can't be much confidence in their election. Between electoral mess-ups, disenfranchised voters and the recent bout of sunny weather it is just like being in Florida...
So after being neck and neck all day yesterday the final result has come down to the Scottish National Party under Alex Salmond winning by a single seat, to be the biggest party in the Scots parliament. But with such a tiny majority they can't form a proper government without going into coalition, most likely with the Liberal Democrats. The Libs bland leader in Scotland already ruled out doing a deal with the SNP if they stick to their guns to set up a referendum for the people to vote on whether we should pursue independence or not, which I really don't understand. I can understand the Libs may be against independence (I am far from convinced myself since no-one has really, properly explained how we can work it) but to be against the most democratic of things, a public referendum where all the people are asked what they think is simply foolish and undemocratic and, in my opinion, a betrayal of Liberal values, which is another reason why I have no faith in the Scottish Liberals anymore. Agree or disagree with the idea of independence by all means, but how can you be against allowing the people to vote on it??
It is also a big shocker to Labour - Scotland has been a huge block of Labour votes for generations, something they could take for granted, even in the bad old days of Herr Thatchler's evil dictatorship from London in the 80s when Labour lost tons of support they still had a huge block here. Now they have blown that after decades, which speaks volumes for how much people are pissed off with their cronyism, nepotism, corruption and utter inept handling of government. A lot of it was also because of what the Labour party has done in power in the London parliament under Blair - clearly a lot of us thought yeah, we know that isn't the fault of the Scottish parliament, but neither have you stood up and criticised them, so you are tarred with the same brush.
Still, such a small majority means it looks like people didn't vote so much for a march to independence as vote against Labour in disgust. It does means that when the notorious war criminal Blair steps down from the London parliament and Gordon Brown takes over (as seems likely) he is going to be a Labour prime minister in London dealing with a Scottish parliament run by his political opponents (embarassingly the constituency right next to Brown's own in Fife also went to the SNP) which means the relationship between London and Edinburgh is going to be rather interesting in coming months and years - which I am sure Salmond will exploit to push the independence agenda. I wonder if I should declare my own Independent Republic of Woolamaloo and offer to make it the free homeland for bloggerdom?
Friday, May 4, 2007
Gag that cartoonist
Yvonne sent me a link to this Daily Dilbert by Scott Adams, which I am guessing may refer to the recent case of the cartoonist Matt who works on the webcomic Three Panel Soul with Ian who was fired from a government job because he and a colleague were talking about hobbies and he said he enjoys paper target shooting. As R Stevens from Dieselsweeties notes, he wasn't talking about guns and people, shooting people or anything of that nature, in fact he was saying he thought it would be good to have guns which would be harder to use to keep people safe. He was fired because his colleagues are now apparently scared of him.
That may sound like nonsense to some who will be thinking hey, he must have done something else, but given that since Columbine a number of US schools have expelled kids who have done nothing wrong except wear a black duster coats (thus probably alienating the kids and giving them a real grieveance to hold, ironically) and an English major at college was harassed by campus police because he had written a horror story so the dumb-ass rentacops on campus assumed he must be a homicidal maniac, and suddenly it looks a lot more plausible. The great American official logic at work - don't do anything to control access to weapons, just fire people you don't like; of course, if Matt was a violent gun nut then surely this would have provoked him to march down to his ex employer and shoot all the former co-workers who got him fired??? Behold the one thing scarier than nutters with guns - the average fucking idiot...
But as Yvonne points out, this Dilbert cartoon also has a certain resonance to something closer to home, about a certain bookselling blogger fired by his version of Dilbert's Pointy Haired Boss, Evil Boss and his equally Evil Sandals, for mocking him and, of course, by firing him allowing him to step up the mocking to outright Defcon One Intercontinental Ballistic Lampooning launches. Stupidity rules, alas, but at least we can take the piss out those stupid smeggers!
Yvonne sent me a link to this Daily Dilbert by Scott Adams, which I am guessing may refer to the recent case of the cartoonist Matt who works on the webcomic Three Panel Soul with Ian who was fired from a government job because he and a colleague were talking about hobbies and he said he enjoys paper target shooting. As R Stevens from Dieselsweeties notes, he wasn't talking about guns and people, shooting people or anything of that nature, in fact he was saying he thought it would be good to have guns which would be harder to use to keep people safe. He was fired because his colleagues are now apparently scared of him.
That may sound like nonsense to some who will be thinking hey, he must have done something else, but given that since Columbine a number of US schools have expelled kids who have done nothing wrong except wear a black duster coats (thus probably alienating the kids and giving them a real grieveance to hold, ironically) and an English major at college was harassed by campus police because he had written a horror story so the dumb-ass rentacops on campus assumed he must be a homicidal maniac, and suddenly it looks a lot more plausible. The great American official logic at work - don't do anything to control access to weapons, just fire people you don't like; of course, if Matt was a violent gun nut then surely this would have provoked him to march down to his ex employer and shoot all the former co-workers who got him fired??? Behold the one thing scarier than nutters with guns - the average fucking idiot...
But as Yvonne points out, this Dilbert cartoon also has a certain resonance to something closer to home, about a certain bookselling blogger fired by his version of Dilbert's Pointy Haired Boss, Evil Boss and his equally Evil Sandals, for mocking him and, of course, by firing him allowing him to step up the mocking to outright Defcon One Intercontinental Ballistic Lampooning launches. Stupidity rules, alas, but at least we can take the piss out those stupid smeggers!
Wednesday, May 2, 2007
Enquiring minds
Nope, we don't need a full, independent, public enquiry into the new revelations that the intelligence services seem to have ballsed up a chance to stop the London bombings before they happened, sez Tony Blair. We don't need an independent, public enquiry into the real reasons why I lied, mislead and cajoled and tricked us into war, sez Tony. No, we don't need to have public knowledge of the attorney general's legal advice over the legality of the war, sez Tony. Hey, why is it everyone wants me gone and no-one trusts me? asks Tony.
Wouldn't you love this odious, wriggling, untrustworthy war criminal git to stand right in front of one of the maimed survivors of the July bombings, look them in the eye and tell them why there shouldn't be an enquiry? Do you think if he tried to tell the truth his head would explode?
Nope, we don't need a full, independent, public enquiry into the new revelations that the intelligence services seem to have ballsed up a chance to stop the London bombings before they happened, sez Tony Blair. We don't need an independent, public enquiry into the real reasons why I lied, mislead and cajoled and tricked us into war, sez Tony. No, we don't need to have public knowledge of the attorney general's legal advice over the legality of the war, sez Tony. Hey, why is it everyone wants me gone and no-one trusts me? asks Tony.
Wouldn't you love this odious, wriggling, untrustworthy war criminal git to stand right in front of one of the maimed survivors of the July bombings, look them in the eye and tell them why there shouldn't be an enquiry? Do you think if he tried to tell the truth his head would explode?
Tuesday, May 1, 2007
Election time
It seems to be an election spring this year - Turkey is in the middle of problems with a flawed election, France is in the middle of presidential elections which are now between a right wing twonk (sorry, Le Twonk) and an attractive woman who hates manga but doesn't seem to have much in the way of solid policies. In the UK there are local elections for councils and in Wales and Scotland there are also elections for the Welsh Assembly and the Scottish Parliament as well this week. It can be very confusing as political parties jockey for attention like ill-tempered and jealous children with bad attention defecit disorder and every second lampost suddenly blooms with strange new colourful foliage as activists go around sticking up signs entreating us all to vote for their candidate, each trying to place their sign higher than opponent's (shame they are slower to come round and remove this political graffiti they inflict on citizens after it is over). Well, for those in Scotland who are wondering just what the smeg to do this Thursday, here's our Woolamaloo rough guide, prepared in collaboration with Professor Albert Major-Majority of the University of Woolamaloo's Department of Political Science and Bullshit:
The Labour Party - main plank for election: please don't blame us for Tony Blair's war crimes, nothing to do with us, honest, oh and let's stick with the Union because Tony told us to. Er... It's okay, he's going soon, honest and can we just say again he is nothing to do with Scottish Labour, it's just we never got round to criticising him because we were too busy using our own Westminster MPs to support his corrupt regime. Er... Vote Jack!
The Liberal Democrats - main plank of election strategy: er, not sure really. Do they have one? Do they even have a leader of the Scottish party anyone has heard of? Moving on...
The SNP, aka the Scottish National Party but also known to generations of Scottish schoolkids as the Scottish Nose Pickers. Main election strategy - play on the age-old Scots tradition of blaming the English for anything ever being wrong, have total independence without explaining how it will work other than referring to North Sea oil revenues which magically go on forever and never run out... Never mind, Sean Connery loves them, but since he hasn't lived in Scotland for decades what the feck does he know about Scottish politics and life in Scotland these days?
The Green Party - main election ideals: build sustainable new power stations by constructing wind turbines powered from the hot air blowing from the major parties' gobs. Create affordable new homes from hemp. Free sandals for all schoolkids.
Various Socialist Parties which used to be one which in a traditional left political move splintered into 173 competing Socialist parties as soon as they tasted the slightest bit of success. Main electoral planks: Tommy Sheridan's fake tan, the bloke from the Royale Family with the big nose says they are great for the 'workers' and the Magical Land Where Everyone Is Paid Lots Of Money and Everything Is Wonderful Always
The Conservatives - main electoral planks: er, some Ayrshire farmers voted for us once and, oh, please don't hold the fact we were the only ones to campaign against the Scottish parliament, so why are we even trying to be elected to an institution we fought against... Oh, where were we? Oh yeah, why to vote for us, er, oh yeah, we have our wonderful new green tree logo drawn by a 3-year old with crayons to show how caring and green we are.
Alas the Woolamaloo Pary isn't standing this year.
It seems to be an election spring this year - Turkey is in the middle of problems with a flawed election, France is in the middle of presidential elections which are now between a right wing twonk (sorry, Le Twonk) and an attractive woman who hates manga but doesn't seem to have much in the way of solid policies. In the UK there are local elections for councils and in Wales and Scotland there are also elections for the Welsh Assembly and the Scottish Parliament as well this week. It can be very confusing as political parties jockey for attention like ill-tempered and jealous children with bad attention defecit disorder and every second lampost suddenly blooms with strange new colourful foliage as activists go around sticking up signs entreating us all to vote for their candidate, each trying to place their sign higher than opponent's (shame they are slower to come round and remove this political graffiti they inflict on citizens after it is over). Well, for those in Scotland who are wondering just what the smeg to do this Thursday, here's our Woolamaloo rough guide, prepared in collaboration with Professor Albert Major-Majority of the University of Woolamaloo's Department of Political Science and Bullshit:
The Labour Party - main plank for election: please don't blame us for Tony Blair's war crimes, nothing to do with us, honest, oh and let's stick with the Union because Tony told us to. Er... It's okay, he's going soon, honest and can we just say again he is nothing to do with Scottish Labour, it's just we never got round to criticising him because we were too busy using our own Westminster MPs to support his corrupt regime. Er... Vote Jack!
The Liberal Democrats - main plank of election strategy: er, not sure really. Do they have one? Do they even have a leader of the Scottish party anyone has heard of? Moving on...
The SNP, aka the Scottish National Party but also known to generations of Scottish schoolkids as the Scottish Nose Pickers. Main election strategy - play on the age-old Scots tradition of blaming the English for anything ever being wrong, have total independence without explaining how it will work other than referring to North Sea oil revenues which magically go on forever and never run out... Never mind, Sean Connery loves them, but since he hasn't lived in Scotland for decades what the feck does he know about Scottish politics and life in Scotland these days?
The Green Party - main election ideals: build sustainable new power stations by constructing wind turbines powered from the hot air blowing from the major parties' gobs. Create affordable new homes from hemp. Free sandals for all schoolkids.
Various Socialist Parties which used to be one which in a traditional left political move splintered into 173 competing Socialist parties as soon as they tasted the slightest bit of success. Main electoral planks: Tommy Sheridan's fake tan, the bloke from the Royale Family with the big nose says they are great for the 'workers' and the Magical Land Where Everyone Is Paid Lots Of Money and Everything Is Wonderful Always
The Conservatives - main electoral planks: er, some Ayrshire farmers voted for us once and, oh, please don't hold the fact we were the only ones to campaign against the Scottish parliament, so why are we even trying to be elected to an institution we fought against... Oh, where were we? Oh yeah, why to vote for us, er, oh yeah, we have our wonderful new green tree logo drawn by a 3-year old with crayons to show how caring and green we are.
Alas the Woolamaloo Pary isn't standing this year.
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