Mmm, tastes like chicken...
Boing Boing has a link to a story from a PBS documentary of a tarantula which is almost a foot across, which apparently devours chickens. Yikes! Man, I'm not overly arachnaphobiac - I'm not keen on spiders, but I'm not utterly terrified of them either - but this would give you the heebie jeebies! I wonder if this crittur is related to the giant spider of Metebelis III who brought Jon Pertwee's era in Doctor Who to an end? I think this is one spider my cats probably wouldn't want to chase and eat...
Monday, May 7, 2007
Sunday, May 6, 2007
Web-slinging
After all the hype and PR frenzy around the world Sam Raimi's Spider-Man 3 finally hit the cinemas this weekend, and off we went to a packed theatre to catch it. Two major villains this time (three if you count some bits with Harry Osborn's son of the Green Goblin), more personal and romantic trouble for Peter Parker (including a rather awful Emo look which makes him appear like a reject from My Chemical Romance) and the introduction of Gwen and Captain Stacey - if you aren't familiar with the comics that might not mean much to you, but they are (especially Gwen), very important characters from the comics. Shame then, that they were barely used, making me wonder why all the hype to excited fanboys about her appearance...
The film itself was very disappointing - far too 'busy' as my mate remarked, like they were thinking, must outdo the first two movies, pack more in regardless of the effect on the story. Don't get me wrong, it isn't a bad film; if it were the first Spidey movie you had seen you'd probably enjoy it more, but it lacks some solid direction, has too much squeezed into it for no reason other than trying to make it look 'wow' (which rarely works if it makes the story suffer) while the emotional arc was just a tiny bit tedious this time, unlike the previous movies. It is still worth seeing though - there are some great scenes there, the Sandman is well done, Venom looks just like he should from the comics (but as with Gwen, not used properly) and I liked the humanised version of Flint Marko, a petty hoodlum, but one driven to crime because he is desperate to find money for treatment for his ill daughter.
And the usual brace of cameos from Ted Raimi, Bruce Campbell (as a brilliant French maitre'd from the Clueso school) and, of course, Stan the Man Lee. Enjoyable Saturday night movie, not brilliant but not bad, suffering mostly by comparison with the first two since we know they can do better than this. Here's hoping Pirates of the Caribbean 3 is better (what is it with 'part 3's in movies this year?) - the second one was rather by the numbers and lacking heart, made me think of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom compared to Raiders of the Lost Ark; bigger budget, the right set pieces and cast (apart from the female lead) but it lacked heart and felt like blockbuster by the numbers. Here's hoping Pirates 3 is more Last Crusade then, so I can enjoy some damned fine swashbuckling.
After all the hype and PR frenzy around the world Sam Raimi's Spider-Man 3 finally hit the cinemas this weekend, and off we went to a packed theatre to catch it. Two major villains this time (three if you count some bits with Harry Osborn's son of the Green Goblin), more personal and romantic trouble for Peter Parker (including a rather awful Emo look which makes him appear like a reject from My Chemical Romance) and the introduction of Gwen and Captain Stacey - if you aren't familiar with the comics that might not mean much to you, but they are (especially Gwen), very important characters from the comics. Shame then, that they were barely used, making me wonder why all the hype to excited fanboys about her appearance...
The film itself was very disappointing - far too 'busy' as my mate remarked, like they were thinking, must outdo the first two movies, pack more in regardless of the effect on the story. Don't get me wrong, it isn't a bad film; if it were the first Spidey movie you had seen you'd probably enjoy it more, but it lacks some solid direction, has too much squeezed into it for no reason other than trying to make it look 'wow' (which rarely works if it makes the story suffer) while the emotional arc was just a tiny bit tedious this time, unlike the previous movies. It is still worth seeing though - there are some great scenes there, the Sandman is well done, Venom looks just like he should from the comics (but as with Gwen, not used properly) and I liked the humanised version of Flint Marko, a petty hoodlum, but one driven to crime because he is desperate to find money for treatment for his ill daughter.
And the usual brace of cameos from Ted Raimi, Bruce Campbell (as a brilliant French maitre'd from the Clueso school) and, of course, Stan the Man Lee. Enjoyable Saturday night movie, not brilliant but not bad, suffering mostly by comparison with the first two since we know they can do better than this. Here's hoping Pirates of the Caribbean 3 is better (what is it with 'part 3's in movies this year?) - the second one was rather by the numbers and lacking heart, made me think of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom compared to Raiders of the Lost Ark; bigger budget, the right set pieces and cast (apart from the female lead) but it lacked heart and felt like blockbuster by the numbers. Here's hoping Pirates 3 is more Last Crusade then, so I can enjoy some damned fine swashbuckling.
Saturday, May 5, 2007
Elected
Well, finally last night the last result crawled in from Thursday's elections (for local councils and also the Scottish Parliament) - there was a huge mess in counting votes because of a new syste, exacerbated by running both parliamentary and local elections at the same time, meaning three sets for folks to fill in (the parliament has two votes, one for constituency MSPs and another for the list vote, which gives independents a chance) and using two different methods. I found it clear enough to use, but I actually took a few minutes to read the instructions, I suspect a lot of the spoiled papers are a result of people simply not paying attention or because they are so used to the older system they never realised it was now different.
Still, with tens of thousands of spoiled papers and a counting breakdown which delayed everything it is little wonder Scottish political commentators are calling it a 'guddle' (there's a good old Scots term for you). And it means a large number of people have been disenfranchised; since in some places the winner only got in by the skin of their teeth (sometimes as low as 40-odd votes) but the number of spoiled ballot papers was higher than their majority it effectively means there can't be much confidence in their election. Between electoral mess-ups, disenfranchised voters and the recent bout of sunny weather it is just like being in Florida...
So after being neck and neck all day yesterday the final result has come down to the Scottish National Party under Alex Salmond winning by a single seat, to be the biggest party in the Scots parliament. But with such a tiny majority they can't form a proper government without going into coalition, most likely with the Liberal Democrats. The Libs bland leader in Scotland already ruled out doing a deal with the SNP if they stick to their guns to set up a referendum for the people to vote on whether we should pursue independence or not, which I really don't understand. I can understand the Libs may be against independence (I am far from convinced myself since no-one has really, properly explained how we can work it) but to be against the most democratic of things, a public referendum where all the people are asked what they think is simply foolish and undemocratic and, in my opinion, a betrayal of Liberal values, which is another reason why I have no faith in the Scottish Liberals anymore. Agree or disagree with the idea of independence by all means, but how can you be against allowing the people to vote on it??
It is also a big shocker to Labour - Scotland has been a huge block of Labour votes for generations, something they could take for granted, even in the bad old days of Herr Thatchler's evil dictatorship from London in the 80s when Labour lost tons of support they still had a huge block here. Now they have blown that after decades, which speaks volumes for how much people are pissed off with their cronyism, nepotism, corruption and utter inept handling of government. A lot of it was also because of what the Labour party has done in power in the London parliament under Blair - clearly a lot of us thought yeah, we know that isn't the fault of the Scottish parliament, but neither have you stood up and criticised them, so you are tarred with the same brush.
Still, such a small majority means it looks like people didn't vote so much for a march to independence as vote against Labour in disgust. It does means that when the notorious war criminal Blair steps down from the London parliament and Gordon Brown takes over (as seems likely) he is going to be a Labour prime minister in London dealing with a Scottish parliament run by his political opponents (embarassingly the constituency right next to Brown's own in Fife also went to the SNP) which means the relationship between London and Edinburgh is going to be rather interesting in coming months and years - which I am sure Salmond will exploit to push the independence agenda. I wonder if I should declare my own Independent Republic of Woolamaloo and offer to make it the free homeland for bloggerdom?
Well, finally last night the last result crawled in from Thursday's elections (for local councils and also the Scottish Parliament) - there was a huge mess in counting votes because of a new syste, exacerbated by running both parliamentary and local elections at the same time, meaning three sets for folks to fill in (the parliament has two votes, one for constituency MSPs and another for the list vote, which gives independents a chance) and using two different methods. I found it clear enough to use, but I actually took a few minutes to read the instructions, I suspect a lot of the spoiled papers are a result of people simply not paying attention or because they are so used to the older system they never realised it was now different.
Still, with tens of thousands of spoiled papers and a counting breakdown which delayed everything it is little wonder Scottish political commentators are calling it a 'guddle' (there's a good old Scots term for you). And it means a large number of people have been disenfranchised; since in some places the winner only got in by the skin of their teeth (sometimes as low as 40-odd votes) but the number of spoiled ballot papers was higher than their majority it effectively means there can't be much confidence in their election. Between electoral mess-ups, disenfranchised voters and the recent bout of sunny weather it is just like being in Florida...
So after being neck and neck all day yesterday the final result has come down to the Scottish National Party under Alex Salmond winning by a single seat, to be the biggest party in the Scots parliament. But with such a tiny majority they can't form a proper government without going into coalition, most likely with the Liberal Democrats. The Libs bland leader in Scotland already ruled out doing a deal with the SNP if they stick to their guns to set up a referendum for the people to vote on whether we should pursue independence or not, which I really don't understand. I can understand the Libs may be against independence (I am far from convinced myself since no-one has really, properly explained how we can work it) but to be against the most democratic of things, a public referendum where all the people are asked what they think is simply foolish and undemocratic and, in my opinion, a betrayal of Liberal values, which is another reason why I have no faith in the Scottish Liberals anymore. Agree or disagree with the idea of independence by all means, but how can you be against allowing the people to vote on it??
It is also a big shocker to Labour - Scotland has been a huge block of Labour votes for generations, something they could take for granted, even in the bad old days of Herr Thatchler's evil dictatorship from London in the 80s when Labour lost tons of support they still had a huge block here. Now they have blown that after decades, which speaks volumes for how much people are pissed off with their cronyism, nepotism, corruption and utter inept handling of government. A lot of it was also because of what the Labour party has done in power in the London parliament under Blair - clearly a lot of us thought yeah, we know that isn't the fault of the Scottish parliament, but neither have you stood up and criticised them, so you are tarred with the same brush.
Still, such a small majority means it looks like people didn't vote so much for a march to independence as vote against Labour in disgust. It does means that when the notorious war criminal Blair steps down from the London parliament and Gordon Brown takes over (as seems likely) he is going to be a Labour prime minister in London dealing with a Scottish parliament run by his political opponents (embarassingly the constituency right next to Brown's own in Fife also went to the SNP) which means the relationship between London and Edinburgh is going to be rather interesting in coming months and years - which I am sure Salmond will exploit to push the independence agenda. I wonder if I should declare my own Independent Republic of Woolamaloo and offer to make it the free homeland for bloggerdom?
Friday, May 4, 2007
Gag that cartoonist
Yvonne sent me a link to this Daily Dilbert by Scott Adams, which I am guessing may refer to the recent case of the cartoonist Matt who works on the webcomic Three Panel Soul with Ian who was fired from a government job because he and a colleague were talking about hobbies and he said he enjoys paper target shooting. As R Stevens from Dieselsweeties notes, he wasn't talking about guns and people, shooting people or anything of that nature, in fact he was saying he thought it would be good to have guns which would be harder to use to keep people safe. He was fired because his colleagues are now apparently scared of him.
That may sound like nonsense to some who will be thinking hey, he must have done something else, but given that since Columbine a number of US schools have expelled kids who have done nothing wrong except wear a black duster coats (thus probably alienating the kids and giving them a real grieveance to hold, ironically) and an English major at college was harassed by campus police because he had written a horror story so the dumb-ass rentacops on campus assumed he must be a homicidal maniac, and suddenly it looks a lot more plausible. The great American official logic at work - don't do anything to control access to weapons, just fire people you don't like; of course, if Matt was a violent gun nut then surely this would have provoked him to march down to his ex employer and shoot all the former co-workers who got him fired??? Behold the one thing scarier than nutters with guns - the average fucking idiot...
But as Yvonne points out, this Dilbert cartoon also has a certain resonance to something closer to home, about a certain bookselling blogger fired by his version of Dilbert's Pointy Haired Boss, Evil Boss and his equally Evil Sandals, for mocking him and, of course, by firing him allowing him to step up the mocking to outright Defcon One Intercontinental Ballistic Lampooning launches. Stupidity rules, alas, but at least we can take the piss out those stupid smeggers!
Yvonne sent me a link to this Daily Dilbert by Scott Adams, which I am guessing may refer to the recent case of the cartoonist Matt who works on the webcomic Three Panel Soul with Ian who was fired from a government job because he and a colleague were talking about hobbies and he said he enjoys paper target shooting. As R Stevens from Dieselsweeties notes, he wasn't talking about guns and people, shooting people or anything of that nature, in fact he was saying he thought it would be good to have guns which would be harder to use to keep people safe. He was fired because his colleagues are now apparently scared of him.
That may sound like nonsense to some who will be thinking hey, he must have done something else, but given that since Columbine a number of US schools have expelled kids who have done nothing wrong except wear a black duster coats (thus probably alienating the kids and giving them a real grieveance to hold, ironically) and an English major at college was harassed by campus police because he had written a horror story so the dumb-ass rentacops on campus assumed he must be a homicidal maniac, and suddenly it looks a lot more plausible. The great American official logic at work - don't do anything to control access to weapons, just fire people you don't like; of course, if Matt was a violent gun nut then surely this would have provoked him to march down to his ex employer and shoot all the former co-workers who got him fired??? Behold the one thing scarier than nutters with guns - the average fucking idiot...
But as Yvonne points out, this Dilbert cartoon also has a certain resonance to something closer to home, about a certain bookselling blogger fired by his version of Dilbert's Pointy Haired Boss, Evil Boss and his equally Evil Sandals, for mocking him and, of course, by firing him allowing him to step up the mocking to outright Defcon One Intercontinental Ballistic Lampooning launches. Stupidity rules, alas, but at least we can take the piss out those stupid smeggers!
Wednesday, May 2, 2007
Enquiring minds
Nope, we don't need a full, independent, public enquiry into the new revelations that the intelligence services seem to have ballsed up a chance to stop the London bombings before they happened, sez Tony Blair. We don't need an independent, public enquiry into the real reasons why I lied, mislead and cajoled and tricked us into war, sez Tony. No, we don't need to have public knowledge of the attorney general's legal advice over the legality of the war, sez Tony. Hey, why is it everyone wants me gone and no-one trusts me? asks Tony.
Wouldn't you love this odious, wriggling, untrustworthy war criminal git to stand right in front of one of the maimed survivors of the July bombings, look them in the eye and tell them why there shouldn't be an enquiry? Do you think if he tried to tell the truth his head would explode?
Nope, we don't need a full, independent, public enquiry into the new revelations that the intelligence services seem to have ballsed up a chance to stop the London bombings before they happened, sez Tony Blair. We don't need an independent, public enquiry into the real reasons why I lied, mislead and cajoled and tricked us into war, sez Tony. No, we don't need to have public knowledge of the attorney general's legal advice over the legality of the war, sez Tony. Hey, why is it everyone wants me gone and no-one trusts me? asks Tony.
Wouldn't you love this odious, wriggling, untrustworthy war criminal git to stand right in front of one of the maimed survivors of the July bombings, look them in the eye and tell them why there shouldn't be an enquiry? Do you think if he tried to tell the truth his head would explode?
Tuesday, May 1, 2007
Election time
It seems to be an election spring this year - Turkey is in the middle of problems with a flawed election, France is in the middle of presidential elections which are now between a right wing twonk (sorry, Le Twonk) and an attractive woman who hates manga but doesn't seem to have much in the way of solid policies. In the UK there are local elections for councils and in Wales and Scotland there are also elections for the Welsh Assembly and the Scottish Parliament as well this week. It can be very confusing as political parties jockey for attention like ill-tempered and jealous children with bad attention defecit disorder and every second lampost suddenly blooms with strange new colourful foliage as activists go around sticking up signs entreating us all to vote for their candidate, each trying to place their sign higher than opponent's (shame they are slower to come round and remove this political graffiti they inflict on citizens after it is over). Well, for those in Scotland who are wondering just what the smeg to do this Thursday, here's our Woolamaloo rough guide, prepared in collaboration with Professor Albert Major-Majority of the University of Woolamaloo's Department of Political Science and Bullshit:
The Labour Party - main plank for election: please don't blame us for Tony Blair's war crimes, nothing to do with us, honest, oh and let's stick with the Union because Tony told us to. Er... It's okay, he's going soon, honest and can we just say again he is nothing to do with Scottish Labour, it's just we never got round to criticising him because we were too busy using our own Westminster MPs to support his corrupt regime. Er... Vote Jack!
The Liberal Democrats - main plank of election strategy: er, not sure really. Do they have one? Do they even have a leader of the Scottish party anyone has heard of? Moving on...
The SNP, aka the Scottish National Party but also known to generations of Scottish schoolkids as the Scottish Nose Pickers. Main election strategy - play on the age-old Scots tradition of blaming the English for anything ever being wrong, have total independence without explaining how it will work other than referring to North Sea oil revenues which magically go on forever and never run out... Never mind, Sean Connery loves them, but since he hasn't lived in Scotland for decades what the feck does he know about Scottish politics and life in Scotland these days?
The Green Party - main election ideals: build sustainable new power stations by constructing wind turbines powered from the hot air blowing from the major parties' gobs. Create affordable new homes from hemp. Free sandals for all schoolkids.
Various Socialist Parties which used to be one which in a traditional left political move splintered into 173 competing Socialist parties as soon as they tasted the slightest bit of success. Main electoral planks: Tommy Sheridan's fake tan, the bloke from the Royale Family with the big nose says they are great for the 'workers' and the Magical Land Where Everyone Is Paid Lots Of Money and Everything Is Wonderful Always
The Conservatives - main electoral planks: er, some Ayrshire farmers voted for us once and, oh, please don't hold the fact we were the only ones to campaign against the Scottish parliament, so why are we even trying to be elected to an institution we fought against... Oh, where were we? Oh yeah, why to vote for us, er, oh yeah, we have our wonderful new green tree logo drawn by a 3-year old with crayons to show how caring and green we are.
Alas the Woolamaloo Pary isn't standing this year.
It seems to be an election spring this year - Turkey is in the middle of problems with a flawed election, France is in the middle of presidential elections which are now between a right wing twonk (sorry, Le Twonk) and an attractive woman who hates manga but doesn't seem to have much in the way of solid policies. In the UK there are local elections for councils and in Wales and Scotland there are also elections for the Welsh Assembly and the Scottish Parliament as well this week. It can be very confusing as political parties jockey for attention like ill-tempered and jealous children with bad attention defecit disorder and every second lampost suddenly blooms with strange new colourful foliage as activists go around sticking up signs entreating us all to vote for their candidate, each trying to place their sign higher than opponent's (shame they are slower to come round and remove this political graffiti they inflict on citizens after it is over). Well, for those in Scotland who are wondering just what the smeg to do this Thursday, here's our Woolamaloo rough guide, prepared in collaboration with Professor Albert Major-Majority of the University of Woolamaloo's Department of Political Science and Bullshit:
The Labour Party - main plank for election: please don't blame us for Tony Blair's war crimes, nothing to do with us, honest, oh and let's stick with the Union because Tony told us to. Er... It's okay, he's going soon, honest and can we just say again he is nothing to do with Scottish Labour, it's just we never got round to criticising him because we were too busy using our own Westminster MPs to support his corrupt regime. Er... Vote Jack!
The Liberal Democrats - main plank of election strategy: er, not sure really. Do they have one? Do they even have a leader of the Scottish party anyone has heard of? Moving on...
The SNP, aka the Scottish National Party but also known to generations of Scottish schoolkids as the Scottish Nose Pickers. Main election strategy - play on the age-old Scots tradition of blaming the English for anything ever being wrong, have total independence without explaining how it will work other than referring to North Sea oil revenues which magically go on forever and never run out... Never mind, Sean Connery loves them, but since he hasn't lived in Scotland for decades what the feck does he know about Scottish politics and life in Scotland these days?
The Green Party - main election ideals: build sustainable new power stations by constructing wind turbines powered from the hot air blowing from the major parties' gobs. Create affordable new homes from hemp. Free sandals for all schoolkids.
Various Socialist Parties which used to be one which in a traditional left political move splintered into 173 competing Socialist parties as soon as they tasted the slightest bit of success. Main electoral planks: Tommy Sheridan's fake tan, the bloke from the Royale Family with the big nose says they are great for the 'workers' and the Magical Land Where Everyone Is Paid Lots Of Money and Everything Is Wonderful Always
The Conservatives - main electoral planks: er, some Ayrshire farmers voted for us once and, oh, please don't hold the fact we were the only ones to campaign against the Scottish parliament, so why are we even trying to be elected to an institution we fought against... Oh, where were we? Oh yeah, why to vote for us, er, oh yeah, we have our wonderful new green tree logo drawn by a 3-year old with crayons to show how caring and green we are.
Alas the Woolamaloo Pary isn't standing this year.
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